Tag Archives: standup comedy

Ep. 131 Billionaires in Bikinis



๐ŸŽ™๏ธ Show Summary: “We Hired a Sitter For This” – Episode 131: “Billionaires in Bikinis”

This summary was written by a robot.

Join hosts Patrick Holbert and Gastor Almonte in Episode 131 of “We Hired a Sitter For This” as they delve into a wide array of topics, from celebrity scandals to parenting advice from Reddit.

Main Topics:

  • ๐ŸŽค Recent Accusations Against Diddy: Patrick and Gastor discuss the recent accusations against Diddy, offering their humorous take on the world of entertainment and pop culture.
  • ๐Ÿ’ฐ Money, Power, and Morality: Explore the philosophical question of whether money and power make people evil, diving into ethical dilemmas and moral quandaries.
  • ๐Ÿ’ผ The Existence of Billionaires: Join the hosts in a lively debate about whether billionaires should exist, exploring economic disparities, social responsibility, and the ethics of extreme wealth accumulation.
  • ๐Ÿ‘‹ The Will Smith / Chris Rock “Slap” Incident: Laugh along as Patrick and Gastor dissect the Will Smith / Chris Rock “slap” incident through the lens of dad’s behaving angrily in public spaces.
  • ๐Ÿ’‘ Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith’s Open Relationship: Delve into the world of celebrity relationships as the hosts share their thoughts on Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith’s open relationship.
  • ๐ŸŒฑ Gardening at Home: Discover the joys of gardening as Patrick and Gastor share their experiences and tips for gardening at home, exploring the therapeutic benefits of connecting with nature.
  • ๐Ÿ“ Parenting Advice from Reddit: The hosts tackle a grab bag of parenting advice questions from Reddit, offering their humorous and heartfelt insights into the joys and challenges of parenthood.

Tune in for a laughter-filled and thought-provoking episode of “We Hired a Sitter For This” as Patrick and Gastor serve up a delightful blend of comedy, commentary, and candid conversation.

Follow your hosts on social media:

Patrick Holbert:

@theholbertreport

www.patrickholbert.com

Gastor Almonte:

@GastorAlmonte

www.gastoralmonte.com


Ep. 129 Regrets & Conundrums



๐ŸŽ™๏ธ Show Summary: “We Hired a Sitter For This” – Episode 129 “Regrets & Conundrums”

This summary was written by a robot.

Join hosts Patrick Holbert and Gastor Almonte in Episode 129 of “We Hired a Sitter For This” as they navigate the hilarious and sometimes challenging world of parenting through the lens of Reddit posts.

Main Topics:

  • ๐Ÿฑ Cat Poop Conundrum: Laugh along as Patrick and Gastor tackle the age-old question of what to do if your small child accidentally eats cat poop, and who is at fault. From humorous anecdotes to practical advice, join them as they explore the unexpected challenges of pet ownership and parenting.
  • ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿ‘งโ€๐Ÿ‘ง Second Daughter Dilemma: Delve into the comedic complexities of fatherhood as the hosts discuss a father’s concerns about having a second daughter and what it will be like to not have a son. From gender dynamics to sibling relationships, Patrick and Gastor share their perspectives on navigating the joys and challenges of raising daughters.
  • ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿ‘ง Parental Bonding: Explore the nuances of parental bonding as Patrick and Gastor discuss what to do if your child forms a stronger bond with the other parent. From jealousy to insecurity, join them in a candid conversation about the evolving dynamics of parent-child relationships.
  • ๐Ÿ“บ Awkward Interruptions: Brace yourself for laughter as the hosts share their thoughts on a couple accidentally being walked in on by their three-year-old during a sexual scenario involving pornography on the TV. From awkward encounters to unexpected interruptions, Patrick and Gastor offer their comedic take on navigating parenthood’s most awkward moments.

Tune in for a hilarious and insightful episode of “We Hired a Sitter For This” as Patrick and Gastor serve up a delightful blend of comedy, commentary, and candid conversation.

Follow your hosts on social media:

Patrick Holbert: @theholbertreport www.patrickholbert.com

Gastor Almonte: @GastorAlmonte www.gastoralmonte.com


Ep. 128 Doctor New York



๐ŸŽ™๏ธ Podcast Summary: “We Hired a Sitter For This” – Episode 128: “Doctor New York”

This summary was written by a robot.

Join hosts Patrick Holbert and Gastor Almonte in Episode 128 of “We Hired a Sitter For This” as they embark on another hilarious and candid exploration of life’s quirks and challenges.

Main Topics:

  • ๐Ÿงข Bespoke Caps and Misunderstandings: Laugh along as Gastor shares his experience with a bespoke fitted cap by “DRNY” (not Doctor New York). From humorous misunderstandings to stylish headwear, explore the comedic world of fashion faux pas.
  • ๐Ÿ‘‚ Embarrassing Ear Infection Tales: Brace yourself for laughter as Patrick recounts his embarrassing ear infection story from a comedy road trip. From awkward encounters to unexpected mishaps, join in as the hosts share tales from the road.
  • ๐Ÿ’‰ Future Dental Plans: Discover the hosts’ plans for future dental care as they discuss the importance of oral health and the quirks of aging. From dental woes to humorous anecdotes, Patrick and Gastor offer a comedic take on dental hygiene.
  • ๐ŸŽ‚ Celebrating Patrick’s Birthday: March 20th marks Patrick’s 43rd birthday, and the hosts celebrate in style. Join them in raising a glass and sharing laughs as they toast to another year of life’s adventures.
  • ๐Ÿ‘ด Aging and Fatigue: Explore the comedic side of aging as Patrick and Gastor discuss their bodies feeling more fatigued and less resilient with each passing year. From humorous observations to relatable experiences, join in the laughter as they navigate the ups and downs of getting older.
  • ๐Ÿ’ฐ “What’s Dad Mad About?” Segment: Join in on the hilarity as Patrick and Gastor share their frustrations in the “What’s Dad Mad About?” segment. From unpaid debts to refund woes, discover the comedic side of financial mishaps and misunderstandings.

Tune in for a laugh-out-loud episode of “We Hired a Sitter For This” as Patrick and Gastor serve up a hilarious blend of comedy, camaraderie, and candid conversation.

Follow your hosts on social media:

Patrick Holbert: @theholbertreport

www.patrickholbert.com

Gastor Almonte:

@GastorAlmonte

www.gastoralmonte.com


Ep. 123 – Dad Bod Dynasty



๐ŸŽ™๏ธ Show Summary written by a robot: We Hired a Sitter For This – Episode 123: “Dad Bod Dynasty”

Comedians and hosts Patrick Holbert and Gastor Almonte are back with another uproarious episode of “We Hired a Sitter For This.” Tune in as they navigate the comedic landscape of fatherhood, sports, and the trials of parenting.

Main Topics:

  • ๐Ÿˆ Super Bowl Shenanigans: Join Patrick and Gastor as they dissect the highs and lows of the Super Bowl, from the thrilling game action to the unforgettable halftime show. Get ready for laughs as they share their unique perspectives on football’s biggest event. (Note from a human- we did not get into the game details at all LOL)
  • ๐Ÿคฐ Patrick Mahomes’ “Dad Bod”: Dive into the hilarious commentary as the hosts discuss Patrick Mahomes’ iconic “dad bod” and its implications in the world of sports and fatherhood. Prepare for laughs as they weigh in on the pressures of maintaining physique amidst fatherly duties.
  • ๐Ÿ’ฐ Gastor’s Sports Betting Saga: Explore Gastor’s comedic relationship with sports betting as he shares anecdotes and insights from his adventures in gambling. From thrilling victories to unexpected losses, Gastor’s journey through the world of sports betting is a rollercoaster of laughs.
  • ๐Ÿ›ฃ๏ธ Life on the Road: Laugh along as Gastor recounts his six-day stint working on the road in Texas and Idaho. From quirky encounters to unexpected adventures, Gastor’s tales from the road promise an entertaining glimpse into life as a traveling comedian.
  • ๐Ÿฝ๏ธ Kitchen Gate Debates: Join the hosts in a comedic exploration of the aftermath of Patrick and Ross taking down the child safety gate in their kitchen. From newfound freedoms to potential kitchen chaos, Patrick and Gastor tackle the age-old question of parenting: What are the rules for a small child with access to the kitchen?
  • ๐Ÿฅ— Teen Nutrition Troubles: Delve into the comedic dynamics of teen nutrition routines as Gastor shares insights into his family’s evolving dietary habits. From navigating newfound autonomy to balancing healthy choices, Patrick and Gastor provide a humorous take on the challenges of teen nutrition.
  • ๐ŸŽ‰ Birthday Party Blues: Laugh and learn as the hosts discuss how parents should handle the delicate situation of a poorly attended child’s birthday party. From navigating disappointment to finding silver linings, Patrick and Gastor offer comedic insights into handling parenting mishaps.

Tune in for a hilarious and heartwarming episode of “We Hired a Sitter For This” as Patrick and Gastor navigate the wild ride of fatherhood, sports, and parenting with their signature blend of humor and insight.

Follow your hosts on social media:
Patrick Holbert: @theholbertreport
Gastor Almonte: @GastorAlmonte
Ross Martineau: @rosserinmartineau


Ep. 115 – We Hired a Sitter #3



This is my second time posting this episode. I made a mistake on the first upload. Apologies to our loyal listeners who eagerly await each episode drop like it’s the McRib at McDonald’s or Pumpkin Spice Latte back in stock at Starbucks. Basically, this episode is a wild ride in podcast experimentation. It’s Guerrilla Podcasting, folks! Anything can happen. Mistakes get made. Chronology be damned! The last segment in this episode was recorded first! Or was it? I don’t know anymore. But the point is, I messed up editing so this one is correct. I hope you enjoy!!!!

please follow us @theholbertreport and @rosserinmartineau on instagram

 


Ep. 114 We Hired a Sitter #2



Hi it’s our second episode of the podcast formerly known as Who Cares About Ross and Patrick. This is WE HIRED A SITTER FOR THIS. Thanks for tuning in.

We talk very very openly about money. How we make it, how we spend it, how much we are debting, etc. You’re welcome! Let our stress be your comfort. Patrick talks about the kind of money he makes (or doesn’t make) as a comic and Ross talks about how changing careers is sending their family onto the precipice of financial ruin.

Also, I celebrated 15 years sober this week (this is Patrick writing by the way). So I recorded a very odd solo segment about feeling grateful about my sobriety. So take a listen if interested. There are rats involved.

Feel free to give us both a follow on IG, we communicate a lot with listeners and producers there. @rosserinstyles and @theholbertreport and @who.cares.podcast

We are thinking of putting together a yoga / creativity retreat in Fall 2024. Would you come?

Also, we are thinking of starting a Patreon to try to proceed with this podcast solvently. We would offer bonus episodes, behind the scenes footage, audience questions, etc etc who knows maybe even tasteful nudes. Would you join a patreon if we started one??


Ep. 113 We Hired a Sitter For This First Episode



This is our first episode back in quite a long time! Our podcast is called “We Hired a Sitter For This” now. One day I will figure out how to change the name of the show and the art, etc, but for now, enjoy our first episode back.


Ep. 111 – Who cares about emergency room nightmares??



When your kid gets a gnarly case of Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease, there’s only one way to get a little comfort: Pretend like it was more painful for you- The Parent. Listen in as we recap what it was like to go to a real life medieval emergency room right here in Brooklyn. We also chat about an even worse trauma: Patrick bombing in grand fashion on the internet.

Are you following us on the socials? Please do! Here’s our IG info:

Podcast: @who.cares.podcast

Ross: @rosserinstyles

Patrick: @theholbertreport

Visit www.patrickholbert.com for upcoming standup shows!


Ep. 110 – Who cares about anything??



Who cares about anything when world war three is on and poppin?? Who cares about anything when you just had an afternoon romp? Who cares about anything when your toddler is a terrrorist?? Who cares about anything when this could be THE LAST EPISODE OF WHO CARES EVER??

We’re saying “could be” because even if it is, that’s only because we are probably going to change the name of the podcast. Take a listen to find out what we might change it to! And let us know if it’s the best idea you’ve ever heard in your life. If you think it’s a bad idea, piss off.

This episode sponsored by iodine anti radiation pills